be confident

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Today I decided to forgo my usual Monday night Step Zumba Aerobics class to run outside in the sunshine.

It was beautiful. Often while on runs by myself, I think a lot. I daydream. I wander. It revives me in a way.

Today my train of thought went like this.

“Oh, TLC’s Waterfalls is playing from my playlist. This song brings me back to 4th grade( I know!), wait this says the song is from 1996. Has it really been 20 years since I was in 4th grade. Wowzers. Life has changed a lot since I played this single on repeat.”

I know. I am a very random person.

Anyway, that got me thinking about my past, and how through those formidable pre= teen years, I had to find a way to gain confidence.

We talked a little about this subject in Sunday school yesterday, and ever since, it has been in my mind.

Confidence.

I promise there is a point to today’s musings, but I need to circle around before I land.

As I started thinking about confidence, I started thinking about my favorite guilty pleasure TV show.

I know I will probably get my seminary wife card revoked for saying this, but I love The Bachelor.

I always have. Ever since season 1, I have been sucked in. I love the drama, the dates, the roses. It is all highly entertaining to me.

I’m not sure which of you reading this are Bachelor fans, but this season I have observed two very different types of confidence.

There is Olivia’s confidence. There is also the very different confidence of one Lauren B.

For those of you who haven’t viewed, Olivia is confidence supreme. She is outgoing, talkative, center of attention, and always the first to steal Ben away. She refers to Ben as her “husband.” She did get the coveted “first impression rose,” and few other speacial things, but it has all gone straight to her head. Basically believes in herself so much that she will stop at nothing to win Ben’s heart.  She is very demanding of his time, and always has to know “where this is going,” She is also insecure, shallow and self-absorbed.

Incidentally, all of these things don’t find her much favor with the other girls on the show.

Then there is Lauren B. Gentle, kind, warm, friendly. She too has had some of Ben’s attention, but it didn’t go straight to her head. She has had a date with him, and doesn’t get visibly upset when he has dates with others. She is calm in their conversations, and trusts the connection they have. She is nice to the other girls, spends time with them, and when there is drama, she is never anywhere to be found.

Both girls have confidence. They both have hope in a situation. Which kind of confidence would you rather have?

I know, you are like “Uhh, Lauren B. . That’s a no brainer.”

I know that seems like the best answer. When it comes down to it though how do you display confidence? More importantly, what is the foundation of your confidence?

Take this passage of scripture for instance:

“Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear—but let your adorning be pthe hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” 1 peter 3:3-4 (ESV)

Most people,  myself included have viewed this passage and thought, “What I can’t be godly with my braids and gold necklaces? Come on God, you can’t be serious?”

Look at verse 4.  I believe this verse has a lot to do with the foundation of the godly woman’s confidence. I notice a few things in this verse.

  • The adorning is hidden in her heart. She doesn’t need all that fancy on the outside to prove her worth. Her worth is in Christ and that bubbles out from within. This is an example of someone who has hidden Truth inside and is letting it transform her.

 

  • The imperishable beauty. One day our hair won’t braid so easy. Our clothes will go out of style. We will lose all of the beautiful things that adorn us on the outside. The only thing that will last forever is God and that relationship that we have with him. It can’t be destroyed, lost, taken away, or too right. God’s love is forever.

 

  • The Gentle and Quiet Spirit– Confidence from a relationship with God brings forth these things. To me this doesn’t mean someone is super quiet and soft spoken. It means that through the relationship they have with God, they are able to have peace, to be at rest, to be friendly, and kind to others. They aren’t trusting in their own ability. Instead they are resting with God, knowing that He has fought the battle, he was it all taken care of. The quiet and gentle spirit reflects a spirit confident in God.

Now, I don’t know where Olivia or Lauren B. stand spiritually. I really hope that they both know Jesus, and if not that He is revealed to them.

I know in my own life, there have been times I was an Olivia. Times where I thought if I was loud enough, outgoing enough, aggressive enough, that everything would work out. I used to think confidence had to come from this really extroverted, my talents, my abilities place.

That place didn’t work for me. I just ended up more confused, more insecure, and not confident in anything.

Then, Jesus took hold of me . It’s been a process and has taken nearly 12 years for me to get to this place. I feel like a big lesson this year for me has been placing my confidence in Him.

  • Not in my abilities.
  • Not in my popularity.
  • Not in my awesome closet of clothes, makeup, and shoes.
  • Just in Him.

I have noticed in my own life that since I have done this I care less about impressing others, I don’t get as upset when things don’t go my way, I am happier with the way I look/feel, I am willing to take more risks, and I have a peace in my heart, even when things don’t work out.

I feel a lot more like Lauren B.

Learning to place my confidence in Jesus and not my own abilities has not been easy.

I don’t know where you are in this confidence journey today, but I know that I will be praying for you.

  • Praying that Jesus will come in and transform your heart.
  • Praying for strength when it gets hard to trust him.
  • Praying that you will become a person with and “imperishable beauty,” and “gentle and quiet spirit.”

Place your confidence in Jesus. He may not hand out roses at the end of every date, but in Him you have a HOPE, a FUTURE, and ETERNAL SALVATION.

Those things will never wilt.

 

 

 

 

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do work.

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I know.

I make you all a lot of empty promises. I say I am going to get back on the blogging bandwagon, then, “BOOM,” out of no where, I fall right back off.

Well, I am trying again. No promises this time. I felt the need in my heart to get back to this. Writing has always been a passion of mine. It’s been nearly 4 years since I have started this blog. Time and time again, I have seen the faithfulness of God play out through each word I type.

Writing is where I feel at home. It’s how I express myself. It lets the thoughtful introvert side of me that is always pushed out by the fun extroverted side of me, come through.

I’m back. Again.

In my 3rd grade classroom, there has been a theme this week. I have noticed that so many of them are becoming such AMAZING, kids, with great hearts. It’s humbling to have the privilege of serving them. Just humbling.

Today we celebrated our Student of the Month at our “Incredible Indian,” ceremony. I chose a girl who serves others well. She is kind, loving, and SUPER-encouraging.  As I picked her, I observed some things.

1. Every student in my class genuinely cheered for her and they seemed just as excited as if they were the winner.

2. She seemed honestly shocked and humbled. In 5 years of giving awards, she is the first one that ever cried tears of joy!

As we came back to class, she asked me, “Mrs. McCarty, why did you pick me?” I kind of went back over the things I had said about her. She said, “Me? Really? I did all those things?”

I then I asked my class how many of them felt special because of something she had done for them, everyone raised their hands.

See, this girl never set out to gain recognition. She never wanted to be important or the best.

Every single thing she does as an 8 year old is filtered through one thing.

Jesus.

Every single card I get. “Jesus loves you.”

Every single compliement she gives. “God thinks you are special.”

Every single day Jesus shines through this little girl.

When I think of her heart, I think of this verse.

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.”

Colossians 3:23-24 ESV

When I think of myself, I really want to think of this verse.

Real talk: that’s not always the case.

Sometimes when I go the extra mile, it’s not always for Jesus. It’s for people. My intentions aren’t always true. Sometimes I even can get a little frustrated or angry when work goes unnoticed.

When those thoughts come creeping in my head, Jesus reminds me of a few things.

A) My life is not my own. When I accepted Jesus at the age of 17 I was “crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” – Galatians 2:20(NLT)

B) My job is not to impress other people. “For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10

C) My desire should be to make Him known, not myself. “That’s why my cup is running over. This is the assigned moment for him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.” John 3:30 ( Message)

He also reminded me that He sees me. He knows my struggles. He knows my trials, triumphs and my heart. He has been with me through the brightest and darkest of days.

He has been there.

 “Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,[a] who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant,[b] being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” Philipians 2:5-8 (ESV)

As far as I am concerned, He is the only one to be working for.

Jesus sees you too. He knows your heart and struggle. Talk to Him. Follow Him. Absorb His word. Take it in today.

With Joy,

Mrs. Kim

 

 

don’t miss this…

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Nearly 3 years ago, I embarked on my first blogging journey.

Writing helped me find a voice I didn’t realize that needed to be let help. Each word I typed ingnited the passion I wanted to share with the world.

I started my blog as I single girl in my 20’s trying to figure out love, life, teaching, and my relationship with Jesus. I now have met  and married the man I always dreamed of, and now figuring out this next step in life’s journey.

Lately, I sensed something was missing. I love the life my husband and I share. We have nice jobs, house, a great church to serve in , and many meaningful relationships. To be honest, I was frustrated for a while.

How can we seemingly have all we want and feel like there is something missing?

Last week, I was sitting in our connect group, and our friend was leading. He said something simple, yet piercing into the innermost part of my heart.

He said, “Don’t miss Jesus.”

Those words stuck in my brain as we drove home. This is what I was missing. Jesus. I was too busy trying to be the best wife, teacher, children’s ministry worker, friend, and daughter I could be. Deadlines, schedules, and routines were consuming my thoughts. Yes, I was reading my bible, going to church, and praying, but its like I was missing the forest for the trees.

So now that I know what I was missing, how can I find it? I looked back over spiritual markers in my life. Times when I felt like I wasn’t missing Jesus. I logged into my blog website(that I haven’t made time for in ages!), and I read things I had wrote. It reminded me of some really great times and lessons learned. I knew what needed to come next.

I started my blog three years ago, to gain insight into what God is doing through the everyday-ness of my life. Now it’s time to gain that insight again. I am ready to write!

I thought about starting a completely new blog, but the more I looked at my old one, I just couldn’t bear to give it up.

I am excited to start my writing journey again, and elated to have you along for the ride. My husband, Anthony, will also be guest blogging from time to time. He is the smartest guy I know and I know you will learn a lot from him. I have updated our about me section and will continue to update in future days.  Welcome back to things Miss hmmm…well Mrs. Kim says(we will work out the details later!)! If you are new things for stopping by!

My nugget for today is Don’t miss Jesus! He is awesome and has a great plan for you! He is all around you. I see His presence in the everyday ness of life, and I am beyond thankful for that!

One last thing, if you feel like something is missing, or maybe you just feel stuck, I am taking comfort in this verse today(maybe you will too!)

“See, I am doing a new thing! Do you not percieve it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland,” Isaiah 43:19.

Don’t miss Jesus this week. Look and see what He is doing and wants to do through you!

With Joy,

Mrs. Kim

Aside

I have a student in my class this year. Among my co-workers, I lovingly call her my “little mama.” She keeps our class in line, she is always helping, and she even makes sure I am on task at times. She is great.

The other day she told me that she wanted to be a teacher just like me because it seemed like the “funnest job ever!” As she told me this, I was thinking in my head, it is also one of the most impossible jobs you can ever do.

One hour later, she was working in a center with a very challenging student I have. She came up to my teacher table and interrupted my group, which she never does.

“Ughh!! HE won’t listen to me! I have tried to help him 4 times and he just doesn’t listen!! He doesn’t get it. I am so frustrated. Maybe I shouldn’t be a teacher.”

I said, “I know, it’s hard, but don’t let it stop you.”

She said; ” I don’t know how you do it every day.”

I sat and though about that little exchange later, and can remember times even this week, where that thought has entered my mind. Satan gets into my thoughts and tells me things like, “You will never get through to him,” “They can’t learn,” “They did bad on that assignment because you didn’t do your job.” I look at other teachers and think ” I wish I was together,” Every time, my students mess up, I internalize and ponder what I can do to motivate them towards the right things.

Those little lies creep in and for a second I believe that it’s not worth it to teach. That  the long hours, tears, training, meetings, book studies, lesson plans, and money out of my pocket aren’t worth the sacrifice.

Then, I remember that Jesus calls us to more than what seems easy or convenient. He calls us to die to ourselves and our ways of life. Could it be that my life as a teacher really isn’t dependent on my own abilities and strength? That when I place Jesus at the center of my career, that he will guide me and lead me? WIll he not refresh me in times when I burn out? Will he not provide for me?

You see I try to disguise this ” I don’t feel like a great teacher ” stuff. Really, I am doubting God’s ability to work through my career.

The truth is, whether it says it in my title or not, I am an ambassador for Christ. I am in a room 8 hours a day with students who need to experience God’s love. 10 of my 15 students are ESL.  All of them come from not-so – ideal home environments.  They need to know they are loved and that Jesus loves them more than anyone on Earth ever could. I have a front row seat to impacting our next generation. Instead of obsessing over being that perfectly, put together teacher, I should be concerned with living my life in front of my students in a way that glorifies God.

I am challenging myself to do that. To fix my eyes on the unseen. To build relationships. To be an example to my co-workers and students.

I am not sure how long God will have me in this season of teaching. I realized that I need to get over myself, and make my time count.

I need to choose joy, over comparing my class to others.

I need to celebrate the wins and not dwell on the losses

I need to correct, but not condemn.

I need to learn to love without growing tired of the task.

Today could have easily been a high stress day. A computer program didn’t work, the kids grew restless during our assessments, there were several “little conflicts” to stop. I even had one kid lose his Friday ice cream truck privilege from the principal and throw an all our fit in the office(we are talking screaming, crying, kicking, threatening,) I almost let those things defeat me.

Instead I remembered Philippians 4:8, and I started thinking about the praiseworthy things.

Like…..

Over half my kids making 100 on their test!

One of my lower students going from a 44 to perfect score in reading, making  perfect score on Math, and remembering her spelling words. (The look on her face was so precious.)

The fact that it was “Fancy Nancy Friday,” and my kids love story time on Fridays.

It was ice cream day and we had a blast.

Someone read their first sentence

My non-English speaker is understanding enough to recall what she has been learning!

We were able to do Just Dance at the end of the day

I was able to find a positive in each child.

Those are the things that push me forward through frustration. Through Common Core, red tape, and statistics. Through worrying about the homes my kids go to, and if they know they are safe.

Knowing that I let God use me today. Knowing I tried to make today great.  Having students like “little mama.”

These things are worth any time, money, or stress I expend.

My verse taped to my desk for this class is Galatians 6:9.

“So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.”

Encouraging you all to not give up in the good you are doing for His kingdom.

With Joy,

Miss Kim

the great teacher?

the wedding show.

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Yesterday, I woke up super excited!

It was bridal show day. I mean, how blessed am I to have a bridal show 10 days after my engagement. 15 minutes from home.

This was the first “bride” moment. I couldn’t wait. I put on a dress that I was super excited to wear and then F.H. ( future husband) came to meet me for church. I looked in the mirror, the dress had a stain. I scrambled find another outfit. We rushed out of my house and realized that the new first service worship time had changed. No big, right? We just had some time to run errands before church.

After church, we ate lunch and headed over to the big affair. I was super smiley and happy.

Then, we got in.

I have a confession to make.

I had a mini-meltdown(no matter what F.H. may say, it was minor. lol).

All the choices, plans, and decisions got to me. The perfect linens, cakes, bouquets,venues started made me feel like our ideas weren’t great.

A girl beside me was freaking out because she only had 1 and 1/2 years left to plan. Were we crazy for aiming for 6 1/2 months?!

I saw the fancy getaways. Suddenly, my teacher salary and f.h.’s works two jobs aspiring church planter salaries didn’t seem that great.

I saw a whole world build for fantasy “biggest day of your lives,” I started to compare the plans I had for my own.

I burst into tears overwhelmed by it all.

My sweet f.h. just stood there and comforted me.

We walked out and saw this wall of t-shirts. There was a bride one right in the middle that said. “It’s all about me.”

As we drove to my house, I thought about that statement. Then, I realized why the bridal show made me meltdown.

It’s because I learned long ago that it is NOT all about me.

For a couple hours, I had gotten caught up in the bridal fantasy of the world revolving around your one special day in time.  Did I really want a huge elaborate ballgown, roses, unlimited budget, and an 8 foot cake? No! For a moment did I feel like I needed those things to have a happy wedding? Honestly, yes.

I looked over at f.h., and said “You know, cakes can fall apart, dresses will tear whether they cost 100 dollars or 10,000. Heck, the whole venue could fall apart. It doesn’t matter how much we plan and control these things. Nothing is guaranteed.”

The wedding can be a show. Just like the big show I attended. You can spend a ton of money professing your love. It still won’t make your marriage any better. I believe that I successful marriage rests solely in our dependence on God to guide us, not how much we can control.

He looked back at me and said, ” But God’s plans are perfect, and his love never fails.”

It was in that moment we made a promise that we are going to spend our engagement time focused on learning how to have a God-centered marriage, as opposed to a “picture-perfect” wedding. That we would remember to fix our eyes on the things that will matter 10 years down the road, and let the rest of the stuff work out how it works out.

I know it won’t be easy, but I know that I don’t want to me just another “all about me” bride.

Do I have ideas? You bet! Do I want the beautiful dress? I have only been looking forward to it for 27 years! If everything doesn’t go perfectly, will it ruin my marriage? Most certainly not.

As I retold this story to my lunch buddies, I realized that although some other brides get fancy stuff, that I have been blessed in so many ways. They told me I have a good fiance’ because a) He went to a bridal fair while Sunday football was on(he LOVES football), b) He enjoyed the bridal fair and let me take silly pictures, c) he knew exactly what I needed in the middle of my little meltdown, d) he is a spiritual leader and I know he will take care of us.

I cannot wait to marry my man! Yes, we may have homemade food, dresses that were on sale, and bouquets an decorations I did myself, but I would not trade it for the fanciest wedding in the world.

I looked over as we sat on my couch, making our bridal party invites(get excited bridal party!), I realized that the man I had prayed for for so many years was sitting right beside me. A man who understands my faults, loves my flaws, lets me vent, makes me laugh, and points my life towards Christ.  He has not only most things I ever wanted in husband, but also the things I needed.

I couldn’t have planned anyone better.

Lord,

I ask that in this time of planning that you remind us of your plans and purposes for us. Help us to remember that You are the only thing that remains and that apart from You all is  in vain. Help us to bless others through our relationship and do more for Your kingdom together than we can apart. We love you. Amen.

I almost forgot. The wedding show wasn’t a total waste. I won a bracelet and after work today I found out we won two nights at the Embassy suites!

 

With joy,

Miss Kim

I guess it’s kind of like a love story.

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So….it’s been a while since the last blog. I think it is high time to catch up. I have greatly missed my writing therapy.

There is just something about getting my heart out in words. 

So, I know some of you that know me may have one big question running through your mind…..

How was the proposal?!
I know, if you would have told me 7 months ago that I would now be an engaged woman, I would have thought you were crazy honestly. I think before we get into the proposal, I need to catch you up to speed. 

This is the story of how I met, fell in love with, and became engaged to my future husband! (Who is the greatest by the way!)

Around late February of last year, I was beginning to sense a need to take more risks in trying to meet new people.  When you are post-grad, live in a small town, and teach 2nd grade, there aren’t many options. So, through much planning a research, I decided to join match.com at the beginning of March. I made a few contacts, and some of them were even Godly, upstanding men. Each day, I would look through the “matches” and say yes/no if I thought on first glance they were interesting. One day this tall bearded man from Arkansas came across the screen. I looked at his interests, likes/dislikes, and all that jazz. The first thing I noticed was his passion for serving God, and his heart for reaching cities through church planting. I obviously clicked that he was interesting.

A couple of days later, on March 14th, I got two lines from this guy. You seem like an amazing woman,,,blah blah, something else. Anyways, I got busy and forgot to write back for a little while, and woke up remembering I needed to write the bearded church planter back. 

So I did. I could tell from his first response to that e-mail, that there was something different about this guy. He didn’t play games, he challenged me, he asked the tough questions, right from the beginning. I got so excited waiting for each e-mail, and everything we talked about just confirmed he was someone I wanted to get to know. 

He talked about growing up in Oklahoma with a single parent and losing a father unexpectedly. He shared his love for church planting and reaching our country for Jesus Christ. We talked about art, music, literature, the Bible. We had 42 e-mails back and forth in 3 days. 

Then, he asked me out. He was very bold about it. I was impressed. Let me tell you ladies, waiting to be pursued is WORTH it!:)

The only problem was that he worked every day. You see, aspiring church planters have to have day jobs. He worked in the Northwest Arkansas area. 3 Days a week in asset protection for DIllard’s, and 4 for Wal-mart in produce. He was off for church and by 6 on Sundays and that was about it. 

So, we agreed to meet in Rogers on a Sunday night. Before that, we had a couple weeks of phone convos and texts. Before the first date, I knew there was a lot of potential.

I prayed a lot for God’s direction and timing. I remember driving up to the restaurant on April 7 at 6:24 PM. I told my friend I could see him waiting and I also told her, ” I think I can do this.”  I was excited to meet Mr. Anthony McCarty!

I walked up to him and felt immediate peace. It was easy. He told me a few weeks later that first night his first impression was “Wow,” (and now I am blushing.)

We had a great dinner and talked about everything, including Calvinism vs. Armenian-ism?(sp). I wasn’t ready for the night to end. He suggested we walk to Barnes and Noble, only to find them closed. We instead sat on a bench and talked for 2 and half hours. Then he walked me to my car and we said goodbye. We had joked about the “3 day rule” and I was really hoping he wasn’t going to follow it. 

It took him 10 minutes to call me.

He talked to me the whole 1.5 hour drive I had back home. 

We have progressed everyday since. The first 3 weeks were only 3 hour dates on Sundays and phone calls each night.

Then, praise Jesus, he started getting every Sunday off.  Since the 4th week we were dating, we have always gone to church together. Sunday will probably always be our day. 🙂 We met the others families, friends, and pretty soon became a big part of each other’s lives.

We both knew very early on that we loved being together, and hated being apart. We learned as our relationship progressed that we worked well together, balanced each other out, and could endure times of crisis in both our lives.

God used several things in our relationship to draw us close to Him and closer to each other. 

It wasn’t too long that I knew I didn’t ever want to be with anyone else. Thankfully and by the grace of God, he feels the same way about me.

The distance, although not too great, was still taking it’s toll. So, when it came time to decide where to work this school year, I applied several places. I was accepted at a school in McDonald County, MO,( just over the Arkansas border) in late May. I continued though interviews close to home to make sure, but by July, I knew I needed to move and take the 2nd grade job in Mac County.

It was hard. I had to leave friends, my church, and my family. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. 

Through the decision making process, Anthony was always by my side.  He prayed, he listened, he let me yell, cry, and process. 

In August I moved to Bella Vista,AR, just a few minutes away from Anthony and his roommate. I started my job, and also started to see what day to day life with my man would be like.  We learned to grocery shop together, plan meals, and what it is like to have a date before 9:30 on a Saturday! 

The past month has been a really sweet time in our relationship. We also started going to Gracepoint Church, a 10 year old SBC plant in Bentonville. Anthony has met with the pastor, a church planting specialist, and seminary representatives. We believe that God has called us to serve in NWA though the help of Gracepoint. We both loved the churches we came from, but know that God has blessed us greatly from being at GP. The first Sunday, I cried because I saw so many things that God wanted to do through us here. I felt foolish for almost staying in Oklahoma. 

So, I know the ENGAGEMENT!

Well, Anthony had hinted that I would propose one day, in a month that ended in R, most likely. Well, that was the plan. He had a big plan to surprise me when my friends and family were around on Labor Day, but realized not everyone could come.  He also thought I was catching on. haha.

So, last Tuesday he came by after work and told me he was going in early the next day and would be off at 7. He normally works til 10 Tues-Fri, so this was a WELCOME surprise in itself. I got the brilliant idea to take him out and surprise him.  He thought we were going to eat at my house then go on a walk. He called my mom and told her he was going to ask me on said walk. 

Well, he went along with my surprise through dinner and dessert. Then,  had to stop at the store. Then, we were going to walk. Then, I decided we should go to my house.

I was tired and just wanted to veg on the couch. He wanted to go for a walk on the trail behind my house. I said no. He insisted.

We went on a walk where he expressed all his feelings and such. He is sappy a lot, so I didn’t catch on until he dropped to his knee, in the dark. He asked! I said yes! 10 minutes later when we were back in the light, I got to see my ring!

It cracks me up to think about how my whole life, I thought I knew how I wanted my proposal to look. I had my own plans that night, and in having those, messed up my fiance’s plan. It was so us though. Looking back, I don’t care that there wasn’t a production, a big prop, or party. You see, meeting my future husband has caused me to surrender my plans even more to the Lord, so that he may mold them together with the plans he has for Anthony.

I had my own plans for that night, and I am so glad they were ruined with the proposal from my future husband.

By the way, he picked last Wednesday because it was 8/28, like Romans 8:28. It’s romantic, right?

Anyways, I have babbled a lot. It may not all make sense to you, but it is our little love story. 

I am excited to marry Anthony because he is the sweetest, most kind, gentle, caring, and affirming man I have ever met. He loves Jesus and people. He challenges me, pushes me, and helps lead our relationship towards Christ. He brings adventure,excitement, and stability. I am so proud to call him my future husband and excited to see where God will lead us together.

Our prayer is that God uses our marriage for His glory. That we will become a team that serves Him whole-heartedly. That we will remember that the purpose of our marriage is not to have the American Dream. but to make God known and to love on His people. That we will remember that God is first, and we can only love each other because he loves us.

I can’t wait to share more of our story. I can’t wait to make this blogging more regular again.

I am a very blessed girl. I am in a new city, I have a new class of 2nd graders to love, a great new church, and  get to marry the love of my life. Praise be to God!!!

With joy,

Miss Kim

 

#16 and #22

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Why hello there!!!

I sure have missed you all! The last part of February and March has been crazy with a capital “C!”

Spring Break, lots of events, and the everyday enjoyment of investing in my precious 2nd graders, hasn’t left a lot of time for writing. There have been some things going on, though!

That’s right. Miss Kim has some news. It has to do with a little something called the bucket list!

In the past month, I have accomplished 2 things on my list! Marking those things off brought pure joy to a list maker and checker-off-er! This will probably be a long post!

Let’s start with numero 16- Eating with a stranger. 

Oh, this story is FUN! My friends, co-workers, and some random by-standers have have received hours of entertainment from this story! I have a feeling in 25 years or so, I will be telling my own daughters this story as they adventure out into the dating world!

So, at the beginning  of February, I began communicating with a young man via e-mail. He was interested in my through some things he had read of mine on the Internet. We e-mailed back and forth for a week or so, and he asked if he could come to the ‘Quah and take me to dinner.(He is from Tulsa.) He also asked for my digits and we began texting. So, all week I am super pumped because the young man seemed pretty cool, and the pictures he sent were cute. He was very flattering to me and full of compliments. I got ready after work that Friday night, making sure I felt extra cute, I prayed, bit the bullet, and went for it! We met at a restaurant like 2 minutes from my house( thank goodness he didn’t know where I lived.) I walk up to him and the usually cheerful texter, said hi but didn’t smile, or compliment, or even shake my hand. He looked a little different than his picture, but looks are like 3 or 4 on my priority list. We start having a pretty good conversation and he loosens up a little bit.  He asks me about my recent overseas trip, and he want wanting to go to Germany comes up. That’s when it gets weird. He proceeds to show me his German last name tattoo, and tells me he has a whole huge dragon on one arm and a bull on the other. Note, I don’t mind tattoos, but these were kinda ridiculous. Then, he talks about Japanese proverbs, drugs he did at a younger age, and his drinking problem. He uses several profanities, apologizing each time, seeing as I am a good girl. He talks about how he really doesn’t practice Christianity, but would for the right person ( yeah, that’s not gonna work for this girl!)  We talk for a while, and then he wants to go play arcade games on the other side of the place. We go over, and he doesn’t have change, so instead takes me outside. He asks what else we can do, and I can’t really think of anything. He suggests my apartment, which I quickly shut down, to which he replys “I am just f-wording with you.” I got my teacher voice out and said “What did you say to me!” The date ended after that. Trust me, there is more to it! 

What I learned from 16, is that a) I can have a conversation with just about anyone, b) that God will make his will obvious and he obviously didn’t want me to waste my time with dragon tattoo, and c) that it’s okay to go out on a limb and do something that scares you.God will get you through.

Speaking of trust, #22, took quite a bit of it. 

Getting on a roller coaster with an 81 degree 156 foot drop, 3 barrel rolls, and 9 points of weightlessness, took some trust.

Did I mention it was wooden and had only been running a week?

We waited an hour in line, then took our seats. As it took off, I had no idea what do expect. Nerves built as I we climbed up to the drop. Then it took off and we were on a wild ride. Lauren was next to me, and I could hear her screams the entire time. We went through all of the craziness of that ride, and came out, safe and sound. I felt joy, relief, and a sense of accomplishment.

I loved it.

The best thing I can compare it to is a dating relationship. I am getting at a point in my life, where I am investing some time in getting to know people I could have a relationship with. It is scary to put yourself out there, knowing all the risks. Getting to a point you feel comfortable, only to find out the wait will be longer than you expected. Then, when you are about to wonder if it will ever happen, you are standing in the front ready to go in. You buckle up and pray for God’s best, knowing a million things could go wrong, Then you are set off on the ride. It has high, lows, and parts you never expected to find. Sometimes when it ends, you want to go again, sometimes you are disappointed, and sometimes  it is just perfect. Each time, though,, when committed to the Lord, will be an experience you learn more about you and grow closer to Him.

That roller coaster was a metaphor for how God is working in my life currently. He is leading me through a journey I have not yet been on. It has had ups and downs, but I know HE WILL WORK!

As I leave today, I want to remind you all of Psalm 118. It has been on my mind a lot lately. There is confusion and chaos, but I know GOD is still GOOD!

“It is better to take refuge in the Lord  than to trust in humans.It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes. All the nations surrounded me,  but in the name of the Lord I cut them down.They surrounded me on every side,but in the name of the Lord I cut them down They swarmed around me like bees,but they were consumed as quickly as burning thorns;in the name of the Lord I cut them down.I was pushed back and about to fall  but the Lord helped me.The Lord is my strength and my defense[a]; he has become my salvation.” Psalms 118:9-14

 

With Joy,

Miss Kim