resolve

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I will be really honest with you all.

A couple months ago, when I first found out I was making the transition to being a classroom teacher, I thought, “Oh, this won’t be a huge change.” I kind of thought it would be a piece of cake.

I stand corrected.

I am still very excited for this opportunity and chance to invest my life in my 24 wonderful 5th graders, but it is not all fluffy,cake-y, goodness.

5th grade is rough.

There are so many things to teach them, things to grade, reports to make, and meetings to go to.

I have some kids that are even hard for me to get through to.

I am not sure what I thought was going to happen, but I can say this is certainly the most challenging thing I have attempted to do.

I desire to be a teacher that makes an impact. A teacher who does fun things and encourages learning. A person the kids can’t wait to be around.

I would like my kids to listen everything I say the 1st time, stay in their seats, and don’t  talk in the hall.

I would like for the chairs and desks to stay neat and everything to work the way it is supposed to.

I would love for people to walk by and say, “This is the best class I have ever seen.”

The first two weeks or so, I was really hard on myself. I started thinking, “What if I don’t teach them the right thing?” “What if I screw them up?” ” I shouldn’t have said that to them.” “What if I don’t have good test scores?”

I started to feel defeated I started to wonder why God brought this opportunity in my life.

I was stressing myself out WAY to much.

Yesterday, it hit me. The reason I was feeling so stressed was because I had placed the focus on the wrong person: myself.

You see, I was worried about how I would look as a teacher, if my students would like me, if my lessons were good. I was entirely selfish about the whole process.

More importantly, I realized that my selfish ambition doesn’t bring glory to God. That broke my heart. The reason I wanted to teach was to influence our next generation and teach them that I value them, and that God values them.

I placed so much emphasis on all the other junk, and not enough on the important things.

I am admitting all of these to you, my faithful readers, because I am admitting that I need help.

I need y’all to help me take the focus off myself and place it on God. (John 3:30)

I had to make a goal for school this year. Like all of the other people on my team, I chose a curriculum-related goal.

I also decided I needed a set of personal goals to help remember where to place the importance while I am teaching my precious(err..sometimes challenging) kids

My School Year Resolutions:

  • I will pray for each child. I will also lift up their families, my fellow teachers, and staff member
  • When I am tempted to act in anger, I will pause and take it to the cross.
  • I will remember that my job when children are in my room is to educate them, encourage them, and empower them.
  • I will work to serve those around me, putting their needs before my own.
  • I will practice, study, train, and look for any opportunity to add to my own knowledge and serve them better.
  • I will remember every day is a new day and a chance to make a difference.
  • I will take time to pause from my work and enjoy life.
  • I will seek to build relationships with my students to help let them know they are cared for, valued, and respected.
  • I will rely on God for my strength, and not my own understanding.

Friends, I ask that you will help me by praying for myself and this school year. I know that I am only in this position because of the grace of God.

My prayer is when my kids leave my class in May that they will be capable, intelligent,and determined. I pray that they will fall in love with learning and desire to do great things in this world. I pray that when they will know that they are loved and cared for by me and more importantly,God.

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, wehave peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we  boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:1-6

I know I will make it this year because I have HOPE. Hope doesn’t disappoint.

With Joy,

Miss Kim

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