Aside

Right in the middle of all of the summertime busy-ness, I had the honor of coordinating a sleepover for the 4-6th graders in our church this past Friday night.

I love working with kids, and love all of our girls, but I have to be honest, after the long week, and appointments all day Friday, I wasn’t the most excited person to be spending all night with a bunch of girls.

Thankfully, God came in and refocused me and I ended up having a BLAST.

We ate junk food, cooked with them, painted nails, danced(err…moved aerobically since we were at the church), played games, had a devotion, watched movies,and lots of other cool stuff.( I won’t post in case there are boys spying!)

I loved it all. I was so thankful to be a part of the experience and VERY thankful for all of the ladies that came, helped, and influenced each of the girls

I didn’t even really mind staying all night with the girls. I do feel like I should apologize to my mom for all the times my brother and I would stand over her and say ” No, you see if she’s awake. No you ask her.” I realized that you can hear it when people say that! Haha!:) I didn’t mind one bit. I even had energy the next day which surprised me.

My most favorite part happened about 1 am.

We gave each of the girls a slip of paper and let them ask any question they wanted to. They asked about clothes, God, friends, creation, and of course boys! It was neat to share my experiences and listen to the other women in the room share theirs.

It made me think back to when I was in middle school. I had people in my life that gave me advice and shared with me, but as I answered their questions, I thought, ” What do I know now that I wish I knew then?”

I thought I should write it down.

Dear Middle School Kim,

I know that somedays you feel on top of the world, and other days you feel invisible. I know that you walk the line on being smart but not too smart, being popular but still doing the right thing, and being the person you were made to be and the person you feel people want you to be.

I know you wonder if you will ever have straight hair, teeth, and be able to make the 10 lay-ups in a row. I know you wonder if your crush will ever know you exists. I know you wonder if you will ever feel comfortable in your own skin.

You hide your insecurities well. You are the life of the party(that won’t change), you make a lot of jokes, and you are the “nice” girl. You try to be the best at everything, so that no one will know you are lacking on the inside. You play basketball although you would rather being doing drama, and you go on track meets, so you can hang out with the boys. People envy you and I know you like that, but deep down inside, you envy those who get to be themselves. 

While you get to eat lunch with the cool kids, the ones you deeply connect with are the outsiders. You will get made fun of for being their friends, but it is worth it. 

You see, I know you. I know that you have always been a wide-eyed girl with big dreams. You want to cure cancer, become the President, and host the Today show. As you grow up, you will still be a big dreamer, and you will get to see some of those dreams come true. Keep the faith, kid. 

You will have a lot of friends come and go. I know right now it hurts a lot when they are mean , start rumors, leave you out, etc., but I promise in the future you will have some of the best friends in the world. They will walk beside you, stand up for you. pray for you, laugh/cry with you, and make your life so much better! Just you wait and see.

You will grow into those varied interests and start to be yourself. You will develop passions for writing, teaching, all things dramatic, planning, organizing, and communicating. All of these things will come together nicely. At the age of 26, you aren’t famous, but you have two jobs where you have amazing influence over children. You get to counsel and teach behavior skills, and you also get to serve God through Children’s ministry at your church. All of those crazy talents you have get put to good use everyday! I mean today you got to turn a church foyer into an airport terminal! How many people can do that?

I know you are dying to know, and I have to tell you, you didn’t marry your crush from age 12. You didn’t marry your first boyfriend from when you where 15. You didn’t marry any of the guys you liked in middle/high school, and that is okay. We have this thing called Facebook now and you keep tabs on them. They aren’t as wonderful as they seemed when you were slow dancing to Tim McGraw, or at the movies in the mall. (Bonus. Your mom doesn’t drive you on dates anymore!) You aren’t married at 26, and that is cool. You are holding out for God’s best. You have been in love before, and it didn’t work out, but you haven’t lost Hope. You have decided to stop putting yourself through so much heartache. You are still praying for God to bring that special person into your life.  You are just waiting on God. He is the main man in your life, and I will get to that later. 

Other random facts. You have your own apartment with an extra bedroom and two bathrooms! You have lots of clothes, makeup, and shoes, which you have always wanted.(you are very generous and practice the get something, give something away policy.) Sometimes you eat ice cream for dinner. You know how when you were 15 and the 2002 Ford Focus is really what you wanted to drive when you turned 16? Well guess what? You have had a 2002 Ford Focus for 3 years now! Go you! You hang out with friends a lot, and take lots of adventures. You like to jog, read, and watch reality tv in your spare time. Your momma is still one of your best friends. Your life is pretty awesome right now. You still hope for things like a husband and family(you really like babies), but you know that those things will happen in time. Until then, you are living it up.

I almost forgot. You do fall deeply in love. Like head over heels. My friend, when you were 17, you accepted Jesus and now you live your life for Him. I know in middle school, you did “Christian” things. Girl, you had a head belief, but it took a while to commit it to your heart. At 15, your family started going to church and you really started to since the Holy Spirit working in your life. You realized that you were spending your life making yourself famous and filling the empty spaces with stuff. You let God come in and change all that, and He has made your life SO GOOD! It was the most important thing you did and will ever do! Life with God is such an adventure. He has given you a heart for people, His children, and service. He loves you and fills all of those empty spaces in your heart. Boys have came and went in your life, but for the past 9 years you have had Him and it has been awesome. He is leading you on an awesome journey. I can’t wait until you meet him, 12 year old Kim! He has a plan for your life, has given you Hope, Joy, and unfailing Love. 

Middle school Kim, you have a great life ahead of you and you still believe the best has yet to come! Don’t worry so much. Don’t ever call a boy( you do once in the 9th grade, it is the most awkward thing ever!) Don’t cut your hair in 10th grade. You cry for weeks. Be yourself. Trust in the Lord. Listen to your momma,girl. She is a wise woman.

Love,

Miss Kim (yes, you go by Miss Kim.)

 

What would you tell yourself? What is something you can tell a special young lady or gentleman in your life this week?

Pray about that.

 

With Joy,

Miss Kim

 

 

A note to my middle school self.

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